Weekend Update Part Two: "Sure I'll Drink That!" Edition
Be sure to read Part One first.Saturday was spent lying on the couch with Bradshaw, watching season two of Project Runway on DVD and chatting about what lazy bums we are. I finally showered and got ready for the party we were obligated to attend around seven, wearing my hair curly* with a ribbon headband and my shoulders bared. We left my apartment at around ten with intentions of being back around midnight.
That didn’t happen.
When we arrived at the party, Stretch was there. We began chatting and then she did it: She reached in her purse and pulled out a pint of 100 proof Hot Damn.
Let me explain something to you: I didn’t drink much in high school. One of the only times I did, it was a night when I drank, separately, Hot Damn, Jack Daniels Down Home Punch, and a tiny bit of Skyy vodka. Since then, I’ve loved the hot, cinnamon-y taste.
Stretch and I alternately took sips from the bottle, occasionally passing it to a third party momentarily. It was at this point that I extended Friday’s “Grab Ass Night” into “Grab Ass Weekend.” Anyone I saw that I knew got a pinch or a pat and I certainly wasn’t shy about it.
Before we knew it, the Hot Damn was gone, and Bradshaw was getting ready to leave. I had intended to go with her, but I was a little drunk and having fun, so I found Dread and asked if he would be willing to take me home when he left. He agreed, Bradshaw left, and the evening continued.
Nametag arrived, wearing a tie and drinking cheap chardonnay straight from the bottle, which I took and began to sip.** Stretch and I went crazy with the camera and there are photos of every memorable moment of the evening.
When Dread decided to leave around three, Stretch and I went with him. When we got to my apartment, she crashed on the couch and was asleep almost immediately, pushing me out of my own living room and away from both computer and television—my preferred means of sobering up before going to sleep. When I go to sleep drunk, I tend to wake up dizzy, which is no fun. To prevent this, I took a bag of Baked Ruffles and a glass of water into my bedroom and began to read a fictional account of the beheading of Anne Boleyn. Yes, I read a book while drunk in a vain attempt to sober up. I fell asleep too quickly though, and Sunday morning was a dizzying affair.
I am not drinking that much this weekend.
*My hair is super-straight. Despite an hour in hot rollers, blasts with the cool setting of my blow dryer, and lots of hairspray, the curls were totally gone by about one.
**Someone managed to get a rather hilarious photo of this, but I didn't notice.
posted by nicalyse @ 11:48 AM
1 Comments:
Oh man. Only you would attempt to read a novel while completely inebriated, Nic. LOL! That makes me dizzy just thinking about that. But I totally hear you on the going to sleep drunk thing. I can't do it either. The second my eyes close I feel like I will surely die a horrible, dizzy death. And reading heightens the effect. So kudos to you for trying that! I am impressed. Even if it didn't really work. Still impressive. :)
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