Love to Hate
Every time I come home to Small Town, I am reminded of all the things that are great about small towns, as well as all of the things that suck. Specific to me, some are as follows:I love that it takes less than five miles and five minutes to get everywhere. I love that I don't have to give my name when I go to pick up my pizza. I love standing on my front porch in my underoos and knowing that no one can see me. I love having free time to finish a fantastic book. I love knowing that I'm incommunicado unless I choose to communicate with someone - that is, no one can show up at my door yelling at me for ignoring their phone calls. I love playing with teensy kittens. I love my dad's fancy pants high-def TV. I love that I have quiet time to just think.
I hate that there isn't anywhere of interest to go. I hate that there aren't any people left here in Small Town that I give two hoots about. I hate that all of the coffee here sucks. I hate that I can't have food delivered. I hate that I can't go get another book immediately after finishing the first. I hate that when I start to go stir-crazy, there isn't anyone around to break up the monotony. I hate that there isn't even somewhere for me to go and read a book and drink a cup of coffee. I hate the compulsion to go to the cemetery where Iris is buried. I hate driving past my grandma's house every time I want to go somewhere. I hate that too much thinking time leads to obsessing time and then I start to lose it in my head.
Maybe coming home is a small doses sort of thing. My mom wants me to stay an extra day or two, which is only possible if I rearrange my work schedule. Due to the last few things on my "hate" list, I'm compelled to tell her that I couldn't work it out. If I spend too much time here, things will start to get bad.
Labels: lists, my insanity, Small Town
posted by nicalyse @ 7:33 AM
3 Comments:
Wow I sure know how all that feels. I visited my own Small Town this weekend.
Good Stuff: my Dad made waffles, my Mom financed my slot plays at the little casino 20 miles away, and I saw some people I haven't seen in a while and it was good.
Sucky Stuff: No one delivers food so we're stuck with going to one of the 3 restaurants in town, there is nothing to do once the sun goes down, and I saw some people I haven't seen in a while and it was sucky.
Yeah, if you're already feeling like you've had enough, then maybe it's a good idea telling mom you can't work it out. No sense in being completely miserable. *shrugs*
Also, COFFEE. Reason enough right there. xD
I agree with Bizz.
On both counts. And have told you as much.
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