Accidental Ambivalence

The Storm: Update Three

It finally started snowing about an hour ago after sleeting all day. Accumulation report tomorrow, along with the class attendance results. I'm praying for a four-day weekend.

My life is so boring.

Labels: weather

posted by nicalyse @ 11:41 PM 0 comments

The Storm: Update Two

Still sleeting. The sidewalk outside my apartment is scary. Weather.com says it's snowing, but I think they lie. Snow does not make noise, nor does it bounce when it hits the ground. Sleet does both of those things.

Despite all of this, my presence has been requested at the home of one Bradshaw, so I think I'm going to brave the roads (and the scary sidewalk).

I'll let you know how that goes later.

Labels: weather

posted by nicalyse @ 2:21 PM 2 comments

The Storm: Update

I've dubbed the weather of the next few days "The Storm", and I thought I would be so kind as to share an update with you.

When I posted last night, it was raining. Soon after, the rain turned into a "wintry mix."* I was hopeful for the icing to begin and classes to be cancelled across the university.

No such luck.

When I got up at 8:30, I checked my email while watching the school closings scroll across the screen. Small Town. Quasi-suburbs surrounding College Town. All schools in the College Town district. I decided that those people knew what they were doing and skipped the 9:30 class in favor of my warm, cozy bed.

I kept re-setting the snooze on my phone, thinking to myself that it was a bad idea for some reason, but not knowing why. When I finally got up at 10:30, I realized: I had class at 11 and a fifteen minute walk ahead of me. Fuck.

With the makeup finished and five minutes to spare, I went into my room to get dressed. I suddenly heard tiny little "tap taps" on my window. I looked. Sleet. The "wintry mix" had changed to straight-up sleet (or freezing rain, if you will).*

Fuck class, I'm not walking in that! I'm now sitting comfortably at my desk sipping a cup of coffee and eating a lightly-warmed apple cranberry muffin. My plans for the day: Watch Center Stage, finish decorating my apartment, maybe put away the boxes. Eat soup. Drink copious amounts of delicious coffee.

I love snow days. More updates coming as the world outside my window becomes more wonderland-like and less like a slick, disgusting mess.

*Thanks to weather.com for all the appropriate terms for the stuff falling out of the sky.

Labels: updates, weather

posted by nicalyse @ 10:58 AM 1 comments

Let it Snow!

It’s been raining since about four this afternoon. Apparently the weather around here is going to be just beautiful for the next couple of days. Let me just give you some insight into the forecast.

Tonight: Quite contrary to the almost 70 degree temperatures of the past few days, the temperature is steadily dropping into the mid-30s. Rain, which started at about four this afternoon, will continue in copious amounts, leading to possible flash flooding. There is also a chance of hail and gusting winds. How gorgeous. Around 3 am, the icing will begin. Clearly, the ground is too warm at the present time for the ice to stick there, but it will certainly stick to trees and power lines, leading to possible mayhem.

Thursday: Somewhere between 6 and 9 am, the air will finally be cold enough for the icing to turn to snow. They’re predicting about half an inch before a lull in the conditions.

Thursday Evening: Early in the evening the snow will begin again, possibly including thunder and lightning (aka thundersnow).* The later it gets, the faster the snow will fall, with predictions of six to twelve inches here in College Town, falling on top of the ice and making the roads a slick, disgusting mess.

Now why does all of this have me so pleased? I love snow. No, seriously, I love snow. I think it’s one of the most beautiful natural elements that we can see, and it’s definitely my favorite weather phenomenon. The fact that it could get me out of classes for the next two days is really just a bonus.

Weather updates coming tomorrow. The update will come much sooner if I manage to get out of classes.**

*I dream of seeing thundersnow. I love snow, I love storms, what’s not to be excited about? Here’s hoping.

**Who am I kidding? If I don't have class, I'm going straight back to bed!

Labels: weather

posted by nicalyse @ 11:06 PM 2 comments

The Tree is Called McTwinkle

I’ve been obsessed with the idea of decorating my apartment for Christmas since Halloween. This is the first time I’ve ever lived in a space that lends itself to serious decorating—and it’s all at my own discretion. I’ve been living on my own for two years, but living in a dorm is hardly conducive to the kind of decorating that I’m interested in doing. While I was at home for Thanksgiving, I asked my mom for some of her old Christmas decorations that she doesn’t use anymore for various reasons, and I ended up with a box of lights, garlands, and ornaments, but no tree. That made me a woman on a mission.

At my mother’s suggestion, Bradshaw and I went decoration shopping at Hobby Lobby. I was doubtful, thinking that the crafty store was just pieces of bigger things that equally crafty people make. I don’t fall in that category, so I expected to wander around for a bit and leave empty-handed.

I was so wrong.

Hobby Lobby might be my new favorite store. I chose a 4’5” (almost as tall as me) tree fairly quickly, knowing that I didn’t want a seven foot monster in my little apartment. Bradshaw and I quickly moved on to ornaments. Aisles and aisles of 50% off. Heaven. I was in Christmas Heaven.

We picked a huge box of glass balls in bright pink, green, and blue. She pointed out a smaller box of balls*: Bright pink and shiny, with glittery pink polka dots.

“This is you in Christmas ornament form, I swear,” Bradshaw told me.

“So you’re saying that, as an ornament, I would be a fat, sparkly, pink ball?”

“Yes.”

Well, okay then.

Next, we went to the individual ornaments. A ball covered in fuscia and gold beads. A ball covered in silver glitter with a glittery blue abstract design.

“Attention shoppers, Hobby Lobby will be closing in five minutes. Please make your final selections and bring then to the front of the store.”

Seriously? It was only eight! Ornament selection pace increased dramatically. Funny blue shape with weird white designs. Shiny, dangly, green mirror-like things. A phallic, multi-colored, mirrored thing that Bradshaw decided she was in love with.**

“Attention shoppers, Hobby Lobby is now closed. Please make your final selections and bring then to the front of the store.”

This time, we followed the directions of the disembodied, amplified voice and toddled to the checkout with our shiny, sparkly treasures. The girl scanned everything, reminded me that the ornaments were 50% off and the tree was 40% off.

Again, seriously? 40% off? I did a little happy dance.

Final total: $38.73. Considering the original price on one of the boxes of ornaments was $20 and I got a tree, I’m extremely pleased with my purchases.

Bradshaw and I returned to the apartment and had dinner. We were joined by Dread (whose chemistry homework prompted me to declare "The Gutter" a science-free zone). I considered asking them to stay and help decorate, but then I remembered that I’m a control freak. I waited until they left and decorated it myself.

I think I’m in love.

*Every time I type that, I giggle a little in my head. This is because, deep down inside, I am a 13-year-old.

**I told her that, barring some unforeseen future hatred of her, this ornament will be hung on my tree every year with a giggle (because it really is phallic) and fond memories. I meant it.

Labels: Bradshaw, holidays

posted by nicalyse @ 9:46 PM 2 comments

Top Ten Good Things About Living Alone

I got this idea from Brooke's post of the same topic, so thanks to her.

1. No one is around to move things in my bathroom (including the curling iron, my makeup bag, and the razor in the shower).
2. I can watch TV naked, sit at my computer naked, sleep naked, get ready in the morning naked—-all without the fear of anyone walking in on me.
3. There isn’t anyone around to comment on my television habits and turn the channel, even if I’ve gotten sucked into the brain-rotting garbage on E! (which I love) or have been watching Gilmore Girl DVDs for four hours straight.*
4. I can season all of my food however I want—which is usually extra spicy.
5. I can leave dirty dishes in my sink as long as I want without grossing out anyone but myself.
6. No one is around to dispute my future plans for an all-pink bedding set.
7. I can nap at any hour, for any length of time, completely uninterrupted.
8. I can spend hours online without anyone bothering me to share.
9. Dirty laundry can live anywhere—which means it leaves where it lands when I take it off.**
10. If I’m not going anywhere all day, I can skip showering and go sans-makeup without any repercussions.

My apartment was dubbed "The Gutter" this evening by Bradshaw, Dread, and myself. We were chatting and every other comment led us to think of something dirty--because our minds are in the gutter. I tend to comment that I live in the gutter, and now the phrase is true.

*I've been known to watch Gilmore Girls for far longer than four hours at a time. I love that I can do that without listening to anyone bitch about my girly television obsession.

**The way this post was written might lead you to believe that I spend all of my time naked. This isn't entirely true, although I'm rarely fully clothed while I'm at home.

Labels: lists

posted by nicalyse @ 7:25 PM 4 comments

The Perks

Most of the annoyances about small town living are also the perks. I’ve certainly done my fair share of complaining about growing up in Small Town, but today I was reminded of how beneficial it can be.

This morning, like every morning, I wanted a cup of coffee. My parents hate the stuff, making instant my only option while I’m here at home. Instant was not going to cut it today, soI went to a diner downtown to get my jolt. Despite the fact that I haven’t been there in months (since the semester started, I think), the owner glanced at me, smiled, and asked if I wanted it for there or to go.

Before work this afternoon, I went to visit a family friend who runs an auto parts store. He’s about my dad’s age, considers my mom a sister, and calls me his “little angel.” More than once he’s taken care of the tires on my car (and called my dad for money later), and he always tells me to call if I need anything—and he means it. I’m fairly certain that this includes destroying any man that does me wrong.

At work, half a dozen people asked me about school, two people recognized my voice on the phone, and someone asked me to make his drink—a limeade—because no one else makes them just right like I do. After work, I decided to go rent a movie. The clerk greeted me by name and gave me an under-the-table discount on my new release.

If you give me enough time, I’m confident that I’ll write about all those small town annoyances I mentioned. I had a laundry list of them in high school, let me tell you. Today, however, I’m just going to accept it for what it is and enjoy it. Tomorrow morning when I get my cup of coffee, or when someone at work asks me for the umpteenth time since I’ve been home how school is going, I’ll just be grateful for the fact that I’m memorable and that people actually care. That is the perk of being from a small town.

Labels: everyday musings, Small Town

posted by nicalyse @ 10:27 PM 3 comments

Gobble Gobble

I love Thanksgiving, mostly because I like to cook and eat. Today, I cut some radishes, seasoned baked beans, mashed potatoes, and made the gravy. After we sat down to eat, I realized that this is the first holiday without Grandma. I've decided not to dwell on that, lest I destroy my holiday spirit.

I have a really big extended family, but everyone hates each other, so dinner was just my parents, my grandpa, and me. I like it better this way though. I don't have to do any extra cleaning before the holiday and I don't have to entertain anyone after dinner. In fact, today I just helped Mom clean up, told Grandpa goodbye, and retreated to my room to let the turkey do its magic.

Happy Thanksgiving to all of you, and I hope that your day was fantastic. If you'll excuse me, I'm off to get a slice of pumpkin pie.

Labels: holidays

posted by nicalyse @ 10:56 PM 3 comments

Stepford-Style Musings

My apologies for the sporadic updates recently. I've been feeling boring and uninspired, but I'm going to try to keep up with it better. I promise!


I like my alone time as much as everyone else does. In fact, being an only child might make me appreciate it even more. Still, I like being around people. I can't imagine having a job where I don't interact with others constantly, because the mental stimulation is something that I enjoy so much.

Labels: everyday musings

posted by nicalyse @ 11:16 PM 3 comments

Lists: Because Making Lists Makes Me Happy

Five Books I Love
The Scarlet Letter
The Other Boleyn Girl
The Lovely Bones
Bridge to Terabithia
The Virgin's Lover

Five Movies Everyone Should See
Boondock Saints
Cruel Intentions
The Sweetest Thing
Fried Green Tomatoes
Love Actually

Five Things That Fire Up My Road Rage
Driving slower than the speed limit
Not signaling
Pulling out in front of me and forcing me to use the brake pedal
Cruising in left lane (it’s an emergency lane, people!)
Inconsistent speeds on the highway

Five Things I Do Daily
Drink coffee
Say “fuck”
Eat junk food
Watch Food Network (I literally cannot remember the last day that I didn't.)
Read (more than street signs and the on-screen channel guide)

Five Foods I Love
Tomato soup
Cheesecake
Cheese ravioli in marinara
Potato chips
Pizza, in any form (gross, right?)

Five Foods I Hate
Ranch dressing (I really don’t get it)
Bell peppers
Fungus (aka mushrooms)
Anything that lives underwater (aka seafood)
Anything prepared at McDonald’s

TV That Makes Me Happy
Gilmore Girls
Grey's Anatomy
Anything NASCAR
Project Runway
Everwood in syndication, my new TV crush

My Five Favorite Beauty Products
ColorTration foundation mixed with moisturizer
Neosporin LT to soften my lips at night
CornSilk translucent powder to combat shine
Murad Acne Treatment gel to keep my skin pretty
Cover Girl Super Thick Lash mascara in black

Top Five Celebrity Crushes
Kasey Kahne
Brad Pitt
Matt Czuchry
Justin Chambers
Casey Mears

Movie I'm Embarrassed to Love (and Own)
Wimbledon

My Favorite Non-Serious Author
Nora Roberts

So why did I put all this up here? Because I was procrastinating instead of working on my WebQuest. I promise, I’ll give you a real post tomorrow.

Labels: lists

posted by nicalyse @ 7:06 PM 2 comments

The Shopping Spirit

I love Christmas. Snow, lights, trees, holiday Starbucks, music, parties, food—and gifts. I’m genuinely one of those people who likes giving the perfect gift as much as receiving it. Maybe it’s odd, but some of my gift-giving experiences have been for non-family—but that’s another post. Remind me to write it sometime.

I’ve been in the Christmas spirit for a while now—since Halloween, really—but the last couple of days intensified it. I put in my Christmas CD, started looking for fun photos, and have a desperate need to watch Love Actually. Yesterday, however, clinched it.

I now have the shopping spirit.

Thursday afternoon I really wanted to go to the mall, but instead Bradshaw insisted on taking me to her apartment to watch Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl and The Emperor’s New Groove.*

Friday, however, I indulged the shopping desire. I’ve wanted a new purse for quite some time, and I knew JC Penney’s was having a sale, along with most of the rest of the mall. I purchased purse number one: black, leather, roomy enough, and exceptionally cheap (remember: poor college student). I walked away from an extremely tempting mauve handbag…reluctantly.

Next I went on a quest for a new, winter-appropriate shower gel, finally settling on Bath and Body Works Very Festive Pomegranate. While I browsed the crowded, heavily fragranced store, I chatted with my mom on the phone, lamenting the purse I left behind. She told me to go get it. I feebly asked what I would do with two purses (pretending that I don’t have eight more at home in my closet). She scoffed and told me that if I didn’t go buy it, I would regret it and whine to her. She hates whining. I denied that I would whine, then tried to say that I didn’t want to waste money, but she interrupted, saying, “Go buy the fucking purse!”

I learned a long time ago that it is not worth it to disobey my mom.

I wanted to buy more things, for myself and for others, but my phone rang with friend beckoning me to join them for a late dinner. So I left. But I definitely have the shopping spirit.

*She was appalled that I hadn’t seen Pirates at all and had only seen bits and pieces of Groove. Clearly, she is insane. Which is probably why we’re friends.

Labels: girl stuff, holidays

posted by nicalyse @ 10:07 PM 4 comments

Why I Hate Autumn

Autumn is my least favorite season. Everyone fawns over the so-called pretty colors and crisp air, but I genuinely couldn’t care less. Besides, I live in Missouri—most of the leaves turn brown. Not only are the colors lacking in my part of the country, I’m missing the whole crisp air thing too. It rains in autumn where I am, and, frankly, that sucks.

I love rain when I’m curled up inside in comfy clothes with a cup of coffee and a good book, or when I’m tucked away in my bed, lulled to sleep by the sound of raindrops against my window. As long as I’m indoors, I love rain. Hell, I don’t even mind driving in the rain as long as the windshield wipers can keep up. I like walking outside in summer rain, when the cool drops cut through the humidity in the atmosphere. Rain can clear, clean, soothe. Unfortunately, it wasn’t doing any of those things today.

First, a bit of background. I only live about three blocks from campus, but the wrong side of campus for my class buildings, meaning that I walk about half a mile to get there. To be perfectly honest, I’m lazy, so I have a parking pass, which allows me to drive to a parking lot that cuts my walk down to less than five minutes instead of the fifteen it is from my apartment. However, I do not have my parking pass right now,* which forces me to walk to class. When I woke up and saw that it was raining, I was less than pleased.

I dressed in what I thought were clothes appropriate for the weather (jeans, t-shirt, a lavender polar fleece jacket, running shoes), put my hair up, grabbed my umbrella, and left behind the dry, cozy warmth of my apartment. Another fun fact about Missouri: It’s windy almost all of the time.** Today was no exception. Thirteen minutes after leaving my apartment, I sat down in my first class. It wasn’t pouring outside, just steady rain, but I was still drenched. My jeans dragged the ground just enough that they had soaked water up to the back of my knees, the wind coming out of the north (yes, it was cold) had been at my rear and ensured that I was wet up to the middle of my back, and just enough water had gotten into my shoulder bag that the top of the papers in my notebook were wrinkling. The only parts of me that weren’t wet were my feet, my face, and my hair.

Two hours later, it was time to make the return trip home. The good news: I was fifteen minutes away from warmth and dry clothes. The bad news: The wind was blowing in my face and I swear it had gotten both windier and colder. By the time I got home, the front of my jeans was visibly wet, my sensitive ears were bright red, and I had the sniffles. I immediately dropped the umbrella in the bathtub (useless piece of junk) and removed all of my clothes—because everything was wet. I changed into sweats and a thermal shirt and drank a cup of coffee while warming some chicken noodle soup. I was still cold after the first bowl of soup, so I wrapped myself in a blanket and spent thirty minutes on my couch doing nothing but concentrating on being warm. It did work, eventually.

Is it any wonder that I fucking hate autumn?

*I would tell the story but it’s not very interesting and I come out of it looking like an ass.
**The exception: When it’s 96 degrees with 84% humidity in the middle of August and you would pay someone to blow cool air in your face because it’s so disgustingly hot.

Labels: weather

posted by nicalyse @ 11:08 PM 3 comments

It's All About Atmosphere

If you’ve ever talked to me, you know I love coffee. If you’ve read this blog, you’ve probably figured it out as well.

Tuesday is my long day, and after spending two-and-a-half hours staring at a computer screen with the unfinished WebQuest mocking me, I decided that I deserved a reward, and as far as rewards go, gingerbread lattes are high on the list.

While waiting for my delicious beverage, I sat at a table and soaked in the coffee shop atmosphere. The man in the corner, camped out with his venti cup and clackety laptop. The two ladies chatting over their decaf mochas. The barista behind the counter teasing his co-worker for being from St. Louis (a man after my own heart). I was so absorbed in the Christmasy surrounds and the sounds of the shop that I almost jumped out of my black ballet flats when my name was called.

I left the shop in a good mood, clutching the hot cup as I drove home, listening to my Christmas mix for the first time this season.

Labels: everyday musings

posted by nicalyse @ 10:35 PM 3 comments

I'll Sleep When I'm Dead

I am an insomniac. Combine that with the fact that I like to stay up late and sleep till noon, and you get a little girl with a very weird sleep pattern.

I’ve been told that sleeping in on the weekends isn’t the way to make up for only getting four hours a night all week, but I think specialists lie. Is it really so wrong that my first thought every single morning is the fuck you that I fling at my alarm clock?* Is it unhealthy that I feel like I need a nap every afternoon? Is an inability to stay awake in my classes without the aid of caffeine really that much of a concern?

I don’t think so.

*Depending on how many times I hit the snooze button, it can also be my second, third, and fourth thoughts each morning.

Labels: everyday musings

posted by nicalyse @ 11:14 PM 6 comments

Take Me As I Am

I think most of us have seen the Dove ads that utilize real, average-sized women instead of models to highlight their products as well as encourage the self-images of women everywhere. Someone gave me the link to the Dove website and asked me to watch the video, which I did. An interesting conversation followed, while several ladies discussed the ideal of beauty and perfection that exists in our society today.

I primp a lot. I wear full makeup every day (foundation, powder, blush, eyeliner, eye shadow, and mascara), curl or straighten my hair, shave my legs, pluck my eyebrows, floss my teeth, and paint my toenails. I buy expensive facial products, have an (small) array of hair products, use whitening toothpaste, love bubble baths, and crave a shopping spree at Sephora. All of that is meaningless though, unless I like who I am on the inside.

Yes, I like to be pretty. I love it when I can finally coerce my ridiculously straight hair into falling in pretty waves down my back. I love it when a combination of diligent skincare and perfectly applied makeup gives the illusion that my skin is porcelain. I would be thrilled with a flatter stomach and slightly longer legs. But none of that means anything in the real world, the world where my mind and my words get me further than my looks. Sure, looks help, but I believe that intellect and personality will eventually win out.

I hate boys a lot of the time, but I do want to be married one day. When I do get married, this man is going to have to deal with a lot: mood swings, picked fights, a desire for both attention and privacy…morning breath, blotchy skin, hairy legs. I’ll be lucky to have someone who loves me despite my “flaws.”

I haven’t met that man yet, which is why I’m off to soak in a bubble bath, followed by full-body moisturizing, eyebrow plucking, and tooth flossing.

Labels: everyday musings, girl stuff

posted by nicalyse @ 10:41 PM 4 comments

A Little Bit of Christmas Comes Early

When I woke up this morning, all I could think about was coffee. Yes, this is a typical thought (right after the fuck you for the alarm clock), but this morning it was exceptionally strong. I decided that nothing would do but Starbucks. I then decided that if I was going to drive for coffee, I was going to go to the grocery store. I’ve recently been craving fresh green beans like crazy, so I bought them and made them. Yes, they were delicious.

I digress. If I was going to the store and Starbucks, I was going to look cute. Jeans, a white jacket over a brown tank top, and a sleek ponytail achieved the desired effect. I also wore the red heels. Admittedly, they didn’t have much of an effect at the store, but when I got to Starbucks there were two older men sitting outside, sipping cups of coffee, a dog at their feet. They both looked me up and down when I got out of my car,* then watched me walk inside.

When I got inside though, I discovered my favorite piece of news this week.** The gingerbread latte has returned.

Let me explain. I didn’t used to be a coffee drinker. I grew up with parents who hate coffee, so, since we all know our parents know everything when we’re little, I decided that I hated coffee too. Drama Queen, my best friend at the time, dragged me to Starbucks right before my freshman year of college and convinced me to have a caramel macchiato. It was okay, but I wasn’t too impressed. Just after Thanksgiving, I was going to visit a friend I the hospital, but was seriously drowsy. I decided to let coffee do it’s magic, so I stopped at Starbucks. Given the time of year, the holiday specials were there, so I tried my chances on a gingerbread latte. It was heaven. It’s been my favorite Starbucks drink since then, and I’m sad that it’s only around for two months of the year.

However, I was under the impression that the seasonal drinks came out after Thanksgiving, not Halloween, so imagine my shock when I discovered it there today! I decided that the tall caramel macchiato could suck it and purchased my overpriced grande nonfat gingerbread latte.

It made my day, even if I did jump three feet when the dog barked when I went outside. I suspect the men had fun watching me get in my car, and if I managed to make their day too, so be it.

*I've been a carhop at my parents' restaurant for almost six years. I'm used to being stared at doing lots of different things. I just don't care any more.

** Before it was the Democratic takeover of Congress, the passing of Amendment 2 in Missouri, and the fact that Rumsfeld is out.

Labels: holidays

posted by nicalyse @ 11:23 PM 4 comments

Cats Are Easier Than Kids

I just got off the phone with my friend Mickey, who I love to death. We went to high school together, we’ve worked together for years, and we just understand each other. We have the same type of attitude, and I’m one of very few people who will tell her what I think or ask her the difficult questions.

Mickey is twenty-two, her son will be three on Thanksgiving, she’s going through a divorce after three years of marriage (to a jerk, I must add), and she’s filing bankruptcy. In 2003 she lost her father, got engaged, got married, and had her son. Life likes to pile up on her, but I think she’s handled it pretty well.

I love her son. I’ve never been much of a baby-sitter (being an only child doesn’t make people want to leave their kids with you), but I’m one of the few who has babysat for him. While he’s always great for me, he’s a bit of a heathen child.* Tonight while we were on the phone, he was proving it. At some point he learned to call her a bitch (probably from his father) and to throw things, so he managed to be put in time out three times in an hour. She spends a lot of time stressed, and even though she loves him, he drives her crazy a lot.

The entire time we were talking, all I could think was I’m glad it isn’t me. At this point in my life, I’m selfish. If I had to take care of someone else, I could, but I don’t want to. I’m concerned with myself, first and foremost. For that matter, I’m still too selfish to even consider being in much of a relationship. Compromise isn’t my strong point right now, and I know from watch my parents that it’s one of the most important components to a healthy marriage.

As much as I love little kids and want one of my own one day, now isn’t the time. As nice as it would be to have steady access to intelligent conversation and sex, now isn’t the time to be looking for a serious relationship either. I’m self-absorbed, and I’m okay with that.

Maybe I should get a cat.**

*That’s right, I just busted out what I like to call “hick-speak.” This is what it’s like where I come from.

**There are three reasons why I don’t have one now. 1. Food costs money that I can spend on clothes. 2. I go home lots of weekends and I would feel bad leaving it behind. 3. Bradshaw is allergic, and if I had a cat here, she could never spend time here any more.

posted by nicalyse @ 10:39 PM 4 comments

Gang Bangers and Country Sangers

I know it’s a little late, but I promised to give an update on Bradshaw’s themed birthday party, so here goes.

I missed Grey's Anatomy so that Bradshaw could dress me as a gangbanger. Considering that I’m a tiny girl from a small town in Missouri, my knowledge of “gangbanger-wear” is limited, but it was decreed by the birthday girl that I couldn’t attend the bash dressed as a “country sanger.” I ended up in white track pants that were three sizes too big over Carolina blue boxers, and a three or four sizes too-big UNC sweatshirt with a Carolina blue bandana covering my left eye and the top of my uber-straight hair. Let me tell you, I was an impressive thug.*

Once we arrived at the party, I was ridiculously amused by Dread**, another St. Louis brat, dressed in Wranglers and a plaid shirt. Oh, the teasing he will endure.

It quickly became clear by the number of people in attendance that my tequila would be safe only if it was in my sight all evening, so Jose was my party date. The Cuervo was not being mixed either. Straight sips directly from the not-cold bottle. De-licious, let me tell you.

There were people at this party who knew none of the residents of the apartment, nor did they know the birthday girl. How they knew to dress up has yet to be determined. There were loud drinking games, intense beer pong tournaments, and dancing on tables.

Quote of the night, a comment from Racer Boy to Dread. Dread was complaining about the tightness of his not-so-tight Wranglers. “They aren’t tight until you can distinguish the outline of each individual testicle.” A true statement. I know, I am from the country.

My night didn’t get any crazier than teasing Dread and very mild flirting with Racer Boy before I went home early. I had to be up at six the next morning to drive quite some distance, so I hugged Bradshaw, praying that she wouldn’t spill her Crown and Coke down my back, then walked he two blocks home in the brisk November air. I ate some Easy Mac (don’t judge, I’m a college student), downed a glass of water, washed my face, and collapsed into my bed.

*As impressive as a 4’10” thug with perfectly manicured fingernails and full makeup could ever be.

**So named because he used to have dreadlocks. And because he’s huge and a defensive lineman for a fairly large university. And he looks scary. However, there are photos of his Wrangler-covered ass that he will forever be teased for.

Labels: alcohol, Bradshaw, updates

posted by nicalyse @ 9:27 PM 4 comments

Tricks, Treats, and Randomness: Part Two

While I was on the phone with Bradshaw, I had walked away from the computer that was basically the catalyst for my anger, not just Tuesday but the rest of the week too. I had calmed down by the time I got off the phone, but the cosmos were still working against me. When I went back to the computer to finally finish my homework, there was another window on the screen, flashing at me mockingly.

This was getting ridiculous.

I resigned myself to having another pointless conversation, delaying sleep even more. (Because at this point, I was exhausted.) All I had to do was read the first two sentences Grease Monkey typed to know that it was going to be an interesting conversation.

hey shorty. I’m a little drunk, but I wasn’t to say happy Halloween.

I returned the holiday greeting and hoped that would be the end of it.

It wasn’t.

Now, before I go on, you need a bit of backstory. GM was Iris’ best friend, and he’s wanted me for as long as I can remember. We flirt, but every time I gave it a chance, it felt weird. In February, he came to College Town to spend the weekend with me. Once he was here, it felt weird, and my maturity flew out my sixth story window. I asked Bradshaw to save me. She called, drunk, and asked me to stay with her, so I did, leaving GM alone in my room all night. The whole situation was awkward enough that we haven’t really talked since then.

So I’m sitting at my computer, calculating how late I would get to bed once I showered and finished my homework when he finally said it:

Did you realize that I wanted you when I was in College Town?

All I wanted to do at that moment was smack my head against the wall and sleep for a week. I knew he was drunk, so I didn’t see any reason to mince words. Plus, he’s four hours away and there’s no danger of seeing him until Thanksgiving, if then.

Yeah, I knew, and I thought I did too until you were here. I was wrong, I
basically led you on, and I’m sorry.

Nothing like pretending to be an adult when your actions were clearly childish.

The conversation continued for some time and we both basically repeated ourselves over and over. I finally told him that I had to shower and said good night. When he told me he wished he could be a fly on the wall in my shower I rolled my eyes, closed the conversation window, and left the computer.

Stupid Halloween.

Labels: updates

posted by nicalyse @ 1:55 PM 4 comments

Splitsville

Are there any happy couples left in Hollywood? Hell, are there any left in America? Okay, my parents, but they aren’t famous, so they don’t count. So I dedicate today's post to mourning Reese and Ryan.

I love Reese and Ryan. They’re both beautiful, and they’re both good at what they do. Besides, I’m pretty sure that I’ll never get tired of watching Legally Blonde or Cruel Intentions. It just seems like all those couples you thought were going to last are breaking up. Brad and Jennifer. Hilary and Chad. Barbie and Ken. And now we send Reese and Ryan to the Hollywood relationships cemetery.

Rest in peace, Hollywood relationship # 4,582,906. Cruel Intentions will never be the same.

posted by nicalyse @ 2:51 PM 4 comments

Tricks, Treats, and Randomness: Part One

Oh, Halloween. A night when little kids are hyped up on sugar and young women have an excuse to dress like sluts. Hey, I’ve done it, but you have to admit that it’s the truth.

The last couple of days have been pretty insane. I’m trying to finalize plans to go away for the weekend, everything decided to blow up in my face on Monday, and it just continued into last night. I have a bit of an ear infection* and I’ve been in a funk, so I decided that going out wasn’t the best idea. Plus, I have a theme party to go to Thursday night that I’ve been ordered to dress up for, so I’ll just consider it my Halloween this year. In any case, I spent much of my evening with the Gilmore Girls and the computer, trying to finalize the plans for this weekend. That is, trying to replace the person who decided five days before we were supposed to leave that she can’t go.

Despite the multitude of problems it has caused in my life, I still have instant messenger services on my computer, and I was using one to talk to a potential replacement for our trip, Racer Boy.** While he can’t go (which is unfortunate) we do share an interest in auto racing, and we got into a really interesting conversation, during which he admitted to testing my knowledge. Of course, that was silly, because I have vast knowledge in the subject. On the other hand, I managed to impress Racer Boy, something that I don’t think happens often, particularly when racing is the subject.

I should probably mention that the hour-long online conversation with Racer Boy was an amazingly effective way to procrastinate instead of finishing the homework for the class I skipped on Tuesday. Just as we were saying good night, another little window popped up. It was the girl who deserted us for this weekend’s trip. She has another pseudonym, but because I’m annoyed we’re going to refer to her as the Deserter.

By the end of that little conversation, my head was pounding, my hands were shaking, and I would swear there was smoke coming out of my slightly aching ears. She basically tried to transfer the blame all to me. She was irresponsible and didn’t make the proper arrangements to miss class the way the rest of us did. Instead of admitting to that, she said that I didn’t inform her of the plans properly, when the plans were still tentative to accommodate her schedule.

I was pissed off.

At this point I picked up my phone and called Bradshaw to inform her that everything was my fault, at least as far as the Deserter was concerned. I just give up.

The night got even stranger, but I think that reliving it all in one night might be just a bit too much for poor little me.

*I definitely went to the doctor on Monday before it even became an infection, she believed that I knew what I was talking about, and gave me a prescription anyhow. I woke up Tuesday dizzy and with a slight throbbing in my left ear.
**I would just call him Racer, but since that's the name of a family cat, it might be a little too weird. I would hate to confuse the two.

Labels: updates

posted by nicalyse @ 11:55 PM 5 comments